Every time I’m leading an executive coaching session, I spend some time talking to the executive about his or her personal life. It seems like idle chit-chat to them, but I’m acutally mining for gold. I know that the executive’s presentation is really about software, aerospace, major retail or something else. Their PowerPoint slides are full of data that no one will remember later, and they are ready to practice.  But it’s in those quiet moments – when they are getting their first cup of coffee – that the presentation magic really happens. Maybe I learn that they have three dogs and a goat. I learn that they climbed Mount Kilimanjaro. Maybe I learned that they tried to climb Mount Ranier, but turned back because of altitude sickness.

It turns out – these are the stories that make me remember them. I have never forgotten a personal story that really describes what makes that person tick. While people tend to be reluctant to tell personal stories on stage – I do everything I can to encourage them to do so. No one will ever remember words slapped on a PowerPoint slide, but they will remember a personal story. If they remember the story, they will probably remember at least pieces (hopefully, the important pieces) of the presentation.  How did that bout with altitude sickness change their view of what’s possible? What has that silly little goat – in a sea of dogs – taught them about cooperation?

So I was on my way to a presenation training session when the phone rang. My client had to cancel. It was icy in Seattle that morning, but that wouldn’t keep this client from his morning run. Because of that, he had a half-rack of broken ribs. Not only could he not present that morning – he couldn’t even breathe. A week later, we met for the presentation training session, and he was still in pain. He told me he couldn’t wait to get back to running, because running helped him to make sense of things.  It was a rare moment – a glimpse into what made this brilliant man tick.  He was reluctant to put this story into his presentation, but he did it anyway.  Ultimately, I heard that his presentation went very well. He received overwhelming feedback that his running story was powerful, and that he connected with the audience on a wonderfully personal level.

A spokesperson may be cool and calm. They breath right. They project beautifully. Excellent, natural gestures.  All of those things are important.  But what about the ability to speak in a way that says, “this is who I am and what I stand for”?

The magic comes when a spokesperson is both controlled and authentic, whether in a media interview or delivering a presentation. Here’s how to make it happen:

• Know your material. Don’t let your PR people write your presentations or key messages and hand them to you just before you speak. Make sure your presentation/message writers know who you are, and what you want to say rather than what they want you to say.
• Get in on the ground floor.  Make sure you have an active role in the presentation, and that you agree with the direction and tone.
• Seek coaching, but don’t let yourself be over-coached.  Practice is critical for success, but too much practice or input from a coach can make you seem wooden; more interested in the process than the meaning.
• Don’t strive for perfection.  Your audience is imperfect, and they appreciate that you are too.  Don’t get caught up in the small stumbles and stutters that are part of natural conversation.  If you mis-speak, simply correct yourself and move on. We all do it.
• Be humble and respectful.  Nothing turns off an audience faster than a patronizing or ego-centric spokesperson.  Say you’re glad to be with the reporter or audience, and mean it.  Don’t be afraid to admit a mistake or two (but do point out how you’ve learned from your mistakes).
• Make it personal. Give them a glimpse of what drives you personally. These can be brief stories about your family; a valued (or difficult) customer; an activity that gives you energy or strength.

Connection and understanding are your goals – not perfection. Know what you want to say, and say it authentically.

You step into an elevator, and realize that your dream customer is in there with you. The doors close, and you have thirty seconds of his undivided attention.  You have the opportunity to tell him who you are, what you do, what makes you special and why he needs to hire you.

In theory, the elevator speech is a great tool. It forces you to get really clear on what differentiates you, and to be concise when you talk about the benefits of your services. What really bugs me, though, is how executives are being taught to commit their pitch to memory, and to use their company’s clever tag lines as part of the pitch.  It sounds slick; not at all authentic.  If I were your dream client, I would be eager for the doors to open – releasing me from your commercial.

This is on my mind because I have a friend who speaks only in Elevator Speech.  If you casually ask him what he does, he says something like, “I provide the highest-quality strategic counsel for leading companies that seek to raise their visibility in the crowded and competitive global marketplace. My only goal is to ensure that you meet your goals, and I won’t rest until we get there”.  Of course I’m paraphrasing to protect the guilty but you get the point. He’s actually a funny, warm and genuine guy – and a pleasure to work with – but you wouldn’t know that by his elevator speech. He has his speech at-the-ready for cocktail gatherings, birthday parties, weddings and, I’m quite sure, elevator encounters. It sounds the same every time.

Here are some tips and guidelines to make sure that your elevator pitch goes all the way to the top:

• Make it real. You want to make sure that you always sound like, well, you. Marketing-speak rarely sounds authentic.  Chart out what it is that you want to convey, and then put those concepts into language that you use everyday.  For instance, when was the last time you talked about a robust ecosystem at a dinner party?(Geek alert: If you talk about robust ecosystems at dinner parties, you need to work on more than your elevator pitch!)
• Listen. If you get out of the elevator having done all of the talking, you’ve missed your real opportunity. That is, to get to know your potential customer. You may well be the right person, at the right time, with the right service – but there is no way for you to tailor your pitch if you don’t take a few seconds to listen to your dream client’s unique needs.
• Know when to stop. If you have brilliantly landed your opening salvo, and the response is, “How ’bout those Yankees?”, save your breath.  Go ahead and talk about the Yankees, and politely offer your business card. You may even make a better connection talking about a great baseball pitch instead of pushing an elevator pitch.
• Always have your business card or brochure ready. Whether the response to your elevator pitch is hot or lukewarm, your business card and/or brochure is the essential closer. You don’t have much time with this person, so you don’t want to waste it talking about contact information.  Let them know how much you’d welcome a conversation outside of the elevator!

My point is this:  Get clear on the benefits of your business, and what you want prospective clients to know about you. If you believe in those benefits, and can speak to them naturally and authentically, you’re much more likely to connect on a personal level, and win the business.

Who hasn’t wanted to blast off from an old employer with fuel and fire? Maybe because of mistreatment, maybe because of burn-out or maybe something worse. Still, there are millions of people who were laid-off, let go or kicked to the curb, and they don’t get real estate in the New York Times.  Greg Smith’s complaints were clear, and perhaps justified, but there was no indication that he worked as a change-agent.

I encourage you to read this article by Julia Hood of PR Week. She simply nails why the NYT Goldman Sachs Op-Ed made me squeamish.

I will always keep my blog free of my personal political opinions, but I have plenty to say about the communication styles displayed by the candidates. As you might imagine, the political season is like a candy store for someone in my line of work.  It has been of no surprise to me that Mitt Romney has trouble connecting with the masses, because he seems uncomfortable around them.  His jokes seem forced; his body language stiff. You rarely get the sense that you’re seeing the real Mitt Romney. Newt Gingrich may appear arrogant and bloviating, but that’s the real Newt.  Rick Perry? Boy Howdy, he is himself. Ron Paul? He really is someone’s crazy uncle, and not afraid to let his personal truths hang out. Huntsman and Santorum both appear more stiff, but there personalities seem genuine.

It’s interesting that the front-runner – the presumed Republican Nominee – gets lukewarm reaction, even among his supporters.  When it comes to  effective communication, what one says is often less important than how one says it.  When Mitt’s opponents shoot insults at him, we’d like to see him get fired up. Instead, he defaults to an awkward smile that hides an authentic reaction.  His attempts at humor fall flat, because we get the sense that he is repeating someone elses joke (a joke that he doesn’t necessarily get).

Mitt Romney needs to be careful. If one of his opponents comes up with some traction, republicans may fall in line behind someone who better connects with real people.

“Why do you love what you do so much?”  he asked.

The question intrigued me on many levels, the first of which was that I had not mentioned that I love what I do. That means it was just showing for him. The answer is, there are dozens of reasons why I love being a communications trainer – or coach, as some people call me.

I have the opportunity to work with some of the smartest people in business. They are leaders; they have advanced degrees; they worked their way up with sweat, street-smarts and hard work. They work in technology or retail for some of the world’s leading consumer brands. That does not mean, necessarily, that they are gifted communicators. Some of the best thinkers are not born the best talkers.  And yet, in their lofty business roles, they are tasked with representing their companies through the media or through public speaking. That can be a scary proposition for even the most steely executive. I love that equation on both sides: I love spending time with such smart people and I love helping them develop the comfort and control to speak well to any audience.

I love how every day is different than the day before. I might be talking about software security one day; coffee the next; the spring fashion collection the day after that; the engineering behind the latest aviation marvel. I always leave these sessions hoping that my clients learned from me. I know that I learned from them.

I love developing deep relationships with the people who call often, and I love the excitement of answering a call for help from a new client.

You know the old addage: Do what you love, and you’ll never work a day in your life.  I don’t have a job. I have pure joy!

Professionally, I can’t say enough how thankful I am for my growing base of clients. This year I’ve had the opportunity to work with some of the most fascinatiing people – who are leaders for some of the world’s largest brands. They are technology, aerospace, retail and consumer brands, and their leadership has trusted me to help them to communicate their stories to the world.  I am humbled, grateful and so excited about the possibilities that the new year brings.

Happy Thanksgiving to you all, and I wish you the happiest of holiday seasons!

“I’m sorry, I’m not Barbara.”

“Oh, is Barbara there?”

“No.”

“When will she be back?”

“She won’t.”

“Oh, then can I tell YOU how the OTHER candidate is going to waste your money, send your job to China, ruin your child and kill your parents?”

“I’ve already voted for that candidate.”

“You’re screwed. Thank you, and have a great evening!”

Oh, they spend hours thinking about their presentation. What data should be included? What should the slides look like? What company messages fit well? But they don’t spend time thinking about their personal story. Why are they passionate about the topic? Why are they the expert? Why should the audience care that the presenter himself cares about the topic? Truth is, if the presenter doesn’t care, neither will the audience.

Some personal information is essential for a powerful presentation.  The audience will remember a personal anecdote or story that ties the presenter to the presentation. I guarantee, they won’t remember three words you strung together on a PowerPoint slide. Over the years, I have found that every executive has a story that is interesting; a story that can demonstrate why they are the expert, or why they’re passionate about the topic.

Let me give you an example. The other day, I was helping a Fortune 100 executive to prepare for an upcoming speech.  She has a PhD in math and statistics, and is now an international leader for the company’s environmental efforts.  She practiced her presentation, reading slide by slide without much care and without any passion.  What’s your story? I asked.  It took some time to draw her out, but it turns out that she is personally committed to the environment in an unexpected way. So committed is she that she and her husband bought 60-acres in the Australian outback. They are restoring the downtrodden land with the hope of returning it to the adjacent Australian National Park.  She takes international conference calls from inside her tent, hoping that the Kookaburras don’t make too much noise. Wow.

The story transformed her speech. Instead of starting with the typical, “I’m here to talk to you about environmental initiatives blah, blah, blah…” , she now begins with, “I want you to know why I take the company’s focus on the environment so personally…” and she goes on to tell the story of the Kookaburras.  It’s personal. It’s powerful. It reinforces that the company has put the right people in the right places. I’ll never forget the story, and her audiences won’t forget it either.

What’s YOUR story?

His Rally to Restore Sanity, set for October 30 on the National Mall should be fascinating. Hotel rooms are booked-full, Fox News talking heads are all a-flutter. It’s billed as a step toward moderation, and I’m all for it!  I’m not saying that beliefs should be compromised if one walks in the world of the far left or the far right.  But the conversation between the two is what needs to come to the middle.

The campaign ad season always shines a bright light on this subject. Those malicious ads: the grainy video of the opponent; the out-of-context quotes; the false juxtaposition of people to distasteful places and things.  The more of this negative schlock we see, the more negative, in general, we become.

Here are the people Jon Stewart says he’s looking for:

We’re looking for the people who think shouting is annoying, counterproductive, and terrible for your throat; who feel that the loudest voices shouldn’t be the only ones that get heard; and who believe that the only time it’s appropriate to draw a Hitler mustache on someone is when that person is actually Hitler. Or Charlie Chaplin in certain roles.

With humor and brains on his side, I’m glad Jon Stewart will moderate this effort toward a more moderate national conversation.